.:Simply Funtasy:.

The other night, lied down on 12++, but I couldn't sleep despite the tiredness and muscle exhaustion from yoga. Tossed and turned for another one hour, I gave up and got up from bed, looked around the room for something to do. Not books - it would usually turn me on and I couldn't choose which book to start. So, I sorted to Jasmine's long-due cross stitch, but then I decided to do something I haven't done for some time... This bro! This fellow is 曹操 Cao Cao, one of the famous figures in Three Kingdoms. I have owned this BanDai miniature figure for some time, but I couldn't find time to do it. I could only manage to assemble the first half (inner body) as I got sleepy and it only took me 30 minutes to make me sleepy! Bravo! :p Then, the next night, I continued to finish up the figure. That included its helmet, shield, boot, cuff, cape and sword. Tada! Friends (who are not really familiar with me) are surprised that I have such hobby. Well... 1)...

致2012的我： 自己知道自己事。 大致上，你自己做了什么，你自己清楚，我也不多说了。  自甘堕落了一年的你，也很清楚，你完全没资格怨天尤人，因为跟身边的人比，你实在是太好命了。 甭说得太远，看自家的大姐就好。丈夫走了，独自抚养一个孩子，你能比她更辛苦吗？ 2013的我想对你说，闹够了，是时候重整心情再冲刺了。 我，会连着你的份，好好努力下去的。 一起加油吧! xoxoxo 2013的我，下

When it comes for blood donation, my biggest obstacle would be my all-time-record low blood pressure. It used to be low hematocrit years back, it must be the increase volume of fat and stuff inside me that overcome the problem once and for all. Today, I was 'rejected' once again by the nurse because of my low BP. I was 'pumped' for about 5-6 times by the nurse, both arms, asked to have nescafe and snacks (although I ate milo and tosai before going to the hospital) , and in the end the blood pressure was still too low, ineligible for donation. There's a blood donation campaign this Sunday which they advised me to have a little exercise before going to increase the BP. I must had a very sad face, because the nurses from the donation room and counter comforted and consoled me when I was leaving the blood bank, non-stop saying " Kesiannya dia... " LOL. Low blood pressure has been 'haunted' on me for so long. Exceeding 100+ in the systolic (upper/first...

Few things happened for the past few weeks of my life: 1) Went back hometown for little ShirLyn's full moon. That girl has grown huge after a week since I last saw her! She's huge in the first place anyway. She is also the first newborn who I hug and carry for the first time in my life! (Note: I am so not dare to carry newborn, due to their small size most of the time, so this huge babe is one exception!) The ceremony was simple. A morning bath followed by some simple 'blessing' thingy: hair and nail cutting, rice and pulut eating, gold biting, paper and pen holding and scribbling, lastly salt and sugar eating. All the eating part was in a very very tiny portion, so no need to worry about that. We recorded a video of it, and it's really cute and funny! :D We've been busy for the whole morning of escorting the princess around town to pray and deliver full moon cakes. Sis's MIL ordered nasi dagang for the day, and it's yummy! People coming over to the hou...

脾气不好的我，最近很容易上火，常常乱发脾气。 星期四/五的巴士事件，让我整个hold不住。 晚上九点的巴士，等到早上六点都还没来。就酱，我不能出席好友芯妤的婚宴，也不能更新我的护照。回不了家的滋味，好难受... 要说发脾气，其实我也只是跟一个人发。其他人嘛，我的声量是比较高而已。That's all. 柜台的两个女孩很无辜，我知道不是她们的错，也一而再，再而三地告诉自己别靠近柜台，可是，到最后关头，我还是发泄了 （我也 只是提高声量而已） 虚伪 。 有个朋友说，“发这种脾气只是自寻烦恼。向NCCC（国家消费者权利中心）和该巴士公司投诉会有效吗？不如娱乐自己痛快些～比如，就自己驾车回去啊...为何要把事情看得这么重？这么生气，何苦呢？” 我失言，不是因为他说的对，而是因为他不在场，他不明白，他不知道，重点：他不是我，他不懂我。 对！ 你们可能会说：在巴士站/火车站/飞机场等等熬夜/度过一夜，我何尝没试过？！大惊小怪！ 对！ 可是... 你过一夜的巴士站，是不是在等候室里面，起码椅子还有cushion，坐/躺着等？ 你过一夜的火车站，可能椅子不多，可是起码是个室内火车站？ 你过一夜的飞机场，何止室内，还有个24小时营业的麦记呢~ (注：我不曾在LCCT和KLIA过夜，如有错误，请指教） 我现在可以正式地说：从2007年到现在，我终于都有在加央巴士站留宿街头的第一次经验了！ 加央巴士站，一个很典型的小小一个巴士站。厕所是跟你收三毛钱，到12点就关闭的那种；别提等候室，根本没有；摆着几张硬邦邦的石椅随你躺坐睡；更别提那些吸人血不偿命的蚊子；我家小猪的喷嚏都比它强的风；开放式的巴士站，前后左右都有路人甲乙丙丁来来往往...等等等等 在这种情况下，我等了九个小时的巴士，等着一辆遥不可及的巴士。 柜台女子说：要么你们可以等，要么我们可以给回你们钱。 脾气不好的我，满肚子的怨气，满肚子的火。 如果这一趟是个平常的回家旅途，我就算了。 我要的不是钱，我要回家！ 最遗憾的，就是得缺席芯妤的婚宴 :( 在彻底被巴士公司打败后，我愤怒又无力地回我这里的家。SMS爹娘报告，SMS韵最新消息，SMS萍道歉，SMS芯妤道歉；收到她回复时，下一秒，脾气不好的我，哭了。 题外话：芯妤，是个文静斯文的女孩，跟我简直差个十万八千里。中五，她坐我前面，另一个损友萍坐我右手边。就酱，斯文善良的她，在...

那天在家乡和妹聊起 ‘百无禁忌’ 的话题，蛮有意思的；又突然读到以前曾经提过的避忌话题...兴致一起就想写些东西了... 她发现，我们全家上下 （不外乎吾可爱的爹，吾娘和四姐妹） 都是百无禁忌的。 所谓百无禁忌，就是没什么pantang，不会也不晓得特意挑时挑日地做特定的事情。 例子: 1) 之前搬家时就是受‘禁忌’之苦。因为新房客的母亲 不允许 她在农历七月搬家，真巧那个月最后一天就是农历七月初一！！所以我无论如何都得在最后一天 前 搬出去！吾旧房东和我都很无可奈何啊～～还时不时在她背后闲话家常 :p 2) 话说，我在外公灵堂守夜时，和表弟俩 （别人都进入梦田了） 在外公棺材旁三更半夜地边烧纸钱边看《The Orphan》 和 《Black Swan》 的啊～！当然没什么好炫耀的，可是我每每提起时，每个人都很unbelivable地瞪大眼睛看着我，让我有种 “你不够我厉害咧！？” 的感觉，很爽下... etc etc etc... (纯粹想不出其他例子...) 因为潜意识下有了这些‘习惯’，我对任何事情（不犯法不违背原则的）的考量是看我体力上能不能办到，而从来很少是禁忌下能不能做。原因不复杂:要我衰我还是会衰，最多在衰的那天买字搏一搏会不会中咯~ 当然，红事白事啊，户外活动一定会参考一下禁忌兼时辰八日，毕竟这种事情实在不能开玩笑。

1. IPCE 2011 : It's Uni's 2nd Postgraduate Conference. As a Bursary co-chair, my life sucks to the max. Sponsorship, fee collection, and the awful messes, plus all the aftermath-sh*t I have to help clean up!! FML to the max (again). Luckily it's over, and our uni Bursary works so slow, I can only wait. 2. PhD transfer report : 不知不觉, it's been a year now!! I need to submit the transfer report as part of the conditions, while waiting for the viva to come. The submission date should be on the 18th, but the boss need to amend and amend again, so the final draft is still in progress. Gah~ Blame my procrastination too though... 3. M&M : Well, what else but this two furballs who make me so occupied. Not blaming them though, they are too adorable! Except the part where they still scare of me to hell :( The most satisfying moment would be when they wheek for food! :D Friends say they have grown so much! Good news. Recently they have some mites problem, used up one da...

I have a lot of these What-If 's questions running in my head lately. What if I choose this... What if I take that... What if I go there... What if I stay here... ...and the list goes on and on. I used to be that kind of person who dislikes 假设性问题 What-If 's questions, and I even scolded few friends for asking me such questions. As years gone by, I realized that I've made A LOT of decisions myself, more or less giving some impact into my life and somehow form who I am right now. For some reason, I start to think about the other way around, the other side of the journey, the other exit of the life crossroad junctions. What would happen if I make the other decision? What would happen if I choose the other exit of that junction? Who would I meet? What kind of challenges I would face? What kind of a person would I become if I did that? ...and it gone a little insane too, that I started to have regrets in some decisions I made, which is not really a good idea. It affected me in...

It is the one-month anniversary of the super great flood, and the second wave has yet to come. Some said on Raya Haji lah, some said on end of Nov lah, some said around this time lah. Sigh~ I hope it can come again though because I want to play water!! Haha! And I have learned my lesson -- just throw everything on my bed will be good. That's the advice from my landlady too. Lately, the relationship between my landlady and me is getting better, but I don't know why, nowadays I have a sin of watching her Astro while she's not in, and when she comes back, I freaked out and quickly escape into my room like somebody doing something inappropriate. 做贼心虚. I never feel so though before the flood. Don't know why... The aunty neighbor never call me or come to chat with me again ever since the flood incidents, although we still greet each other when we meet. Honestly, I am glad. *evil smile* Do you know she would call me in the weekend to chat for a whole hour although we are just ...

Friends (especially the secondary school's and poli's) and family know that I was the type of person who never gain weight no matter how much I eat. I have been this way for the past 25 years, and I kinda proud and often bragged about it. Since I leave home for Politeknik, every time I went back, the compulsory questions from my aunts were: "How come you are thinner and thinner each time you come back? You didn't eat is it? Life there very tough huh?" Well, it was quite annoying back then, because it happened every single time I went back, but now, I kinda miss it. Although along the years, friends and people around me had warned me about the belly which started to grow (and their comment was the belly was obvious because I was thin), my weight never exceed 50kg, and I still received comments that I was kurus kering in Uni. They said it was genetic, and I truly believed it because my mum was in this group too - tall and thin. Anyway, things changed. They said w...

As far as I can remember, I have never had any drama-alike dreams in my whole life, needless to say same group of people, until last two nights. On the first night, it started off with me trying to run away from the flood, while needed something to be done (clothes or something). It's a dream, so it doesn't have to make sense. I can't recall what was the plot of that dream, but in the end, I was stuck and unable to go anywhere, while the 'thing' was given to this particular guy to get it done. First point: I dreamed of my dad who wanted to help me escape from the flood, few friends, but I seriously don't recognize this guy. On the second night (last night), I was still stuck, the Kangar-Alor Star road was flooded, but the 'thing' was completed, and the guy handed it over to me, and we chatted. It was a nice conversation yet I forgot the content of our conversation. Still, I don't know who he is, and now I don't even remember how does he look li...

My room doesn't smell muddy or badly after all. Thank goodness! Shops and supermarkets have been stocking up Febreeze and other air freshener products on their shelves and yet some shops are still out-of-stock. Anyway, I still need things that can me-wangi-kan my room, just in case out of sudden some awful odor wakens me in the middle of the night. When I put all my stuffs at the checkout, the cashier's mind might be thinking:"Another flood victim. Poor dear~" Last weekend was all sweat and pain (muscle ache). There's some part when tears almost join the fun too. Thank god too, it was a bright sunny weekend, so I could clean all the mess and did my laundry. Cleaning the floor mats and laying them was the toughest job of all. Cleaning it was easier, but laying them was a difficult task as I have one heavy furniture (the wooden bed frame) and few quite big size furnitures that I could not move out from the room. Being a stubborn cow as I always am who don't wan...

上个星期,老板下了指示,在他离我们而去 (去朝圣啦~) 的当儿，我们得帮忙改小学弟小学妹的assignments. 他倒也没给个限期,只是放下句狠话 “你们要慢慢改也可以的,只是两个星期后又会有新的要改罢了嘛,看你们应付得来没有咯...” ... 好一句典型的老板话... 就在这种‘紧要关头’,我才发现到,原来我超级热爱安静的环境. 当然，每个人都喜欢安静的时刻. 有些人可以在吵闹的环境中工作; 有些人一静下来就做不了东西; 有些人就只喜欢吵吵闹闹,压根不想做东西。 偏偏我这个死脑筋,做事向来都要看自己的东北风。 风来得正巧嘛做起事来特别起劲; 风不太对劲嘛速度就慢得要命; 狂风暴雨时嘛鬼神都不敢靠近... 话说回来，我们的研究室本来就属于‘严重拥挤’的状况。几个青春洋溢的少女青年和数位大哥大姐，分成两边来坐。 就在这人潮里，有几位‘重量级’人物的嗓门都像装了大声公一样响亮宏伟，再加上时不时会有三两个小客人到访，天生就好像没懂过如何调声量，说话时深怕隔两栋楼的朋友没听到他们说的故事似的，说话几乎都用喊的了。还真不知道他们是如何保养如此洪亮的嗓门。 平常再怎么吵也就算了,偏偏就要在这水深火热之时就来闲话家常,huuuiyoooh.... 也还好他们都是在 那 一边吵,坐在 这 一边的我虽然也遭殃,也没比坐在 那 一边的朋友惨。 所以有时候，我挺喜欢一个人呆在研究室。虽然有时会安静得有点诡异,我很享受这种安宁的时刻。至少我可以很自在地做我爱做的事情而不用担心有人往我的电脑银幕盯 (也不见得人家有兴趣看,可能只是我想太多了) 在加央家里,我也享受了绝对的宁静。 房东aunty在几个星期前去了新加坡，另一个帅哥housemate每次都不回来，所以具体上，我一个人拥有了整间家。 房门打开，电脑声量开得不怕被人骂的程度，没有穿bra (有穿衣!) 在家里乱乱走。爽! 只是有时候邻居aunty会跑过来跟我串门儿，我们还试过讲1个小时的电话(虽然我们就隔一间家)... 但，最近，我觉得家里太静了。少了房东aunty的福建连续剧 而且Astro smart card竟然inactive!害我也没得看 :( , 少了个人在家, 我连晚上睡觉都要在房间里开个小灯才敢睡觉... 也不知道为什么，最近老爱想有的没的，害自己的心里都毛毛的... 好，开始扯远了... 总之，除了怨别人吵，我也很...

I've never had this kind of deep-into-the-heart feeling before whenever I went for a trip. There's few things happened within the island hopping event that leave me feeling really down. 1. Friends proclaim me a darn brave heroine, as if nothing can scare me off. This statement was literally proven when I was robbed in SS2, and now this. Sometimes ago, I was told the monkeys in Pulau Dayang Bunting are dangerous, not in the sense of physically assault human, but rather snatch bags for food and stuffs. ^The main point of their behavior is they are not scared of human. 7 girls were on the same boat for the event. Before we leaving the boat to the island, the brother of the boat advised the girls at least 3 times about the monkeys' behavior as the girls brought along a lot of food. Yet, as the girls planned to go for a swim, they carried along their bags of clothes and stuffs. The worse part was, they were using the recycle cloth bags rather than a backpack or bags that look n...

Luckily the handsome housemate came back the night before, or else it's kinda creepy to stay home alone. The day began normally. I woke up at 7.47am (exactly), getting ready, and off I went to research cluster. I settled down, prepared breakfast, set up laptop, and began my usual breakfast drama meal. Replied the birthday wish sms. The internet connection was suck. When the drama (was watching Castle season 2 episode 13) was about 10 minutes more to finish, a MSc buddy came over to sort of complain about the allowance forms we suppose to submit by today, but our supervisor was so late to give us any response. Then, things got a little tension. We rushed here and there to settle the matter, only to find out that mine was no problem at all, but their problem was all over the place which to say that I AM a damn good liar. Haha!! After everything was in place, it was noon. I went back home to grab some stuff and met the handsome housemate again. *blush* After lunch, went back to rese...

Last week, I was humming chinese new year song continuously while riding motor home from HUSM, then I was stunned for few seconds when waiting for the traffic light. "What is wrong with me?" I thought myself. I really can't explain why I would suddenly hum CNY song, it just goes on and on. Must be one of my brain neurons twitched. I leave it alone and continue humming again. Automatically. ....... And so, I understand the cause behind it today, as I started to sing another happy mandarin song which share a same rhythm with CNY song. It's because of the traffic jam that start attacking Kota Bharu town for the Raya!! It really awesomely SHIOK when you overtake all the cars stuck in traffic jam with motor, it's so shiok, I wanna hum happy song! :) As I heard another old-time song in the Taiwan variety show today, I'm gonna hum 紫丁香 tomorrow. :)

...也不会是一切啦.至少，那么一点点的改变是会有的... 偶然之间，我再看回以前我写过的部落格，包括Friendster的。 老实说，还真的让我超级失言... 读着我曾经写的一字一句,可以想象到当年的我是多么的幼稚,无知,口无遮拦,天真无邪,等等等等... 经过时间洗礼和各种各样顺心兼不如意的人事物,虽然也没把我变成一个了不起的圣人,可是我觉得还是有些许的改变,让我可以不再像从前一样地痛苦,心碎。 所以，我倒是可以敢敢讲一个事实:我变得非常自私了,我变得爱自己多很多了。 朋友，对你们来说，我变了吗？ *.^ 外加: 昨晚梦到去世多年的外婆。忘了我们到底在忙着做什么，只记得，外婆跟表弟交头接耳后，表弟跟我轻声说:"妮姐,Ahma问你,你有男朋友了吗?" ... ... ... -___________________-" INCEPTION!!!! 跟小妹说起这件事,她的theory很厉害:"说不定是三姨婆跟外婆说的!!! (原因) " 三姨婆是dreamer, 我是target,表弟是objection,外婆是Mal... -___- beh tahan... Whatsoever,这个梦告诉我: 我的潜意识想要个男朋友 !!! :p

...感性的东西，还是要用华语写来得有hwei-ling一些... 终于，我毕业了。 苦苦挨了三年。痛过，伤过，开心过，快乐过，愤怒过，忧愁过... 这一切，在上台拿到文凭时，都如云烟般飘过~~ 我曾经以为，我前不久还掩盖不住的愤怒会随着我好久好久。 没想到，就一个微笑，一切都破解了。但是，尴尬还是有的。这一层膜，我很不想拿下来。 算我小气吧~我就是要以牙还牙。 三年过去了。还有好多好多年在前面等我。 要加油噢~!! 好了，开始语无伦次了。得快点离开。拜拜~~

Finally. 3 years of hardship, sweats, tears and pain has come to an end. Finally. The reason I resigned 3 years ago, has bear a fruit of success. Finally. Finally. Finally. :) My whole family came to Kangar for my Istiadat Konvokesyen. My FYP supervisor was there to witness our graduation. I am happy, contented, and satisfied. Sometimes, when I am in the blank mode, the memories of the 3 years life come flashing and spinning in my mind. There's happy, pain, hatred, disappointment, glad, etc etc etc. All kinds of moods mingle in mind, heart and soul. It is not any ordinary 3 years that I can easily compare with, neither my 3 years Diploma life, or any of the long years I've been through. This one is special. I'm sorry for those who I offended intentionally and unintentionally, and you have my forgiveness for pissing me off. Thanks to everyone who has 'pushed' and guided and led and helped me in getting this Degree. You're welcome to those who wants to thank me. I...

I left out one part of story in the First Week post, and I think it is rather suitable to be written in the second week post during the convocation robe collection period. Ever since I came back to Perlis, I've met a handful of people I know, and all of them saw me like they apparently saw a ghost. Seriously. They saw me into the eyes, 四目相望, their pupils dilate, points their finger towards the smiley-face me and say: "What are you doing here?? You are supposed to be at UM or USM or some other place right?" This happened for few times already last week, and continue to happen this week when I met friends during the collection of convocation robe. The action repeat each time I meet someone. However, there's one million-dollar reaction that still keeps me LOL up until today. It is the very first and still the first silent version of the above conversation I had since I came back. I bumped into few friends at the pasar malam last week, and stopped to chat with them. The...